Wednesday, 3 August 2011
So it’s been a fairly interesting month. On the surface it’s been fairly standard. I’ve been working a lot racking up the hours in an effort to save as much money as possible for the next part of my Aussie adventure. Work has been fairly consistent: I’ve been training new people every week as apparently I’m a terrible person to work with and I keep scaring them off and it’s been busy enough that the days pass quickly. I did get one really good person but the poor girl got appendicitis and is now off work recovering. On the up side because none of the floor staff will stay then woman in charge of the deli section has been stepping in and she is fabulous. Therefore I have no worries about being off for the next two days as I am sure she can do my job better than I can.
Outside of work life has been a little strange as a little stressful. We’ll start with strange. Normally I don’t like to socialise with the people I work with. I like having a work-personal separation but here if I stuck by that I wouldn’t have any friends at all therefore it’s unsurprising that I have become good friends with some of the girls I work with. They are all younger than me which is weird because most of my friends back home are either the same age as me or older. They are all completely lovely and it is nice that I have been getting almost daily hugs at work though as I said, strange. Also there was an ‘inquisition’ in my section recently as peoples curiosity finally got the better of them and I was asked questions about my private life so I told them about Josh which was a bit awkward but it’s nice as now I can mention him occasionally without feeling too awkward. My new friends and I have been out a few times in Jindy since I last posted. We’ve been for dinner a couple of times and out drinking once or twice. Mostly I’ve been taking it easy as I am tired after working and I would like to save as much money as possible whilst I am here. The strangest thing about life at the moment is that it’s more like ‘real’ life and not like a backpacker life at all. I pay rent, I have friends, I cook almost every day and on my days off I clean and bake. Also it’s very cold and I am living in jeans and jumpers so it’s like being in the UK except without all my wonderful UK friends and family. It’s a lil’ bit weird but it’s all good and I am enjoying it which is a lot strange considering how much I work!
OK so that was the strange now the stressful. As I said work is fine, now I’ve come to term with the fact I’m not indispensible. It’s stressful to be on the other side of the planet from your friends and family when things happen. I knew it would be hard but I don’t think I understood just how hard it could get. I thpught I would be sad to miss all the birthdays and other occasions and I was but hard as it was to miss these expected occasions nothing prepared me for finding out that my dad was going in to hospital. It turns out he had a growth on his bowel which they are pretty sure was cancerous. If it sucks to miss the good times then there isn’t a word to describe what it’s like to be so far away when you know your family is suffering. All I wanted to do was get on a plane and go home and be with them. I didn’t though. This is my new dream and there is nothing I can do at home. At home I am an unemployed bum here I am a backpacker on a great adventure. I came out here to get away. I couldn’t live the 9-5 life so I thought to come over here whilst I still could and have a look. What I have discovered is that I love to move around. I thought long and hard about what I would do if the prognosis wasn’t good and I am sure no-one would be surprised to know that I knew if it was bad I was going home. Fortunately it looks like he’s going to be hanging about for a good few years yet so I’ll keep wandering a little while longer.
The UK will always be my home and it remains my final destination but I know now that I love to travel. I am saving as much money as I can because I know that If I don’t then this will all be over and I’m not ready for that yet. It may be crazy but as well as aiming for my second year visa here I’m already considering applying for the New Zealand one. If NZ works out well then there’s Thailand and Japan and Asia and India and Canada and I’ve always said I’d love to go back to the USA, I think this could be a good life if I can make it work. I love travelling. I love meeting new people and hearing their stories even when those stories don’t always have happy endings. You all know about my friend who died recently well today is his funeral. Today we say goodbye and I am sad because I wish I could have known him longer but I am happy that I knew him at all, even if it was just a little bit for a little while. RIP Sam x